View from a broad

It's been a terrible week for the police. The dreadful loss of WPC Sharon Beshenivsky, the news that conviction rates for rape are at their lowest for 30 years, which can't be helped by the ruling in Swansea that you can now, apparently, legally rape an unconscious person.

However, it's good to know that they're still managing to track down some criminals - such as Margaret Boyle-White, told off by police in Watton for the offensive crime of ... breastfeeding in public. Well, I don't know about you, but I'm sleeping a lot safer in my bed now I know that the rogue breastfeeder has been stopped.

Will people ever realise that when we get our breasts out to nourish an infant we're not actually being flashers? I wonder if it comes under Amnesty's definition of "flirtatious behaviour"?

Meanwhile, the actually quite offensive continues to flourish - in this case, the Black Eyed Peas' latest hit, My Humps, which includes the lyrics, "My lovely lady lumps/ in the back and in the front/ I got you spending all your money on me/ What are you going to do with all that breast/ all that breast inside your shirt?" Well, seeing as you're asking, I'm going outside to breastfeed on the pavement. Got a problem with that?

Just as you always thought, male car dealers (ie all of them) are indeed ripping you off. Fewer than half will offer cut prices to a female buyer, as opposed to more than 80% for men.

Quite right too. If you have enough money to buy a new showroom car, which as everyone knows instantly loses a quarter of its value the second you drive it off the forecourt, £100 here or there isn't going to bother you much.

In fact, it's almost certainly worth paying the extra not to have to start humiliating conversations with desperate, oleaginous car salesmen, or involve yourself in the ludicrous, sweaty-palmed willy-waving men call "driving a hard bargain".

Dear the Past. People are holding a vigil at the deathbed of a drunken old alleged wifebeater like he's a medieval pope. A prostitute-visiting footballer's shopaholic girlfriend is a national role model for young girls. There's no hover-bikes. Don't even ask about Gary Glitter. But, on the upside, you can see Margaret Thatcher's daughter peeing on prime-time TV every night.